PAD APRIL #5DISCOVERY

All fired up and nowhere to go
But here
My fingers on the keys, waiting, listening
For when the “gush” is finished messing
and the real stuff comes forward
Poems, stories, narratives
as new to me,
as anybody else who reads them,
I write as directed

The Muse waits for me to SHUT UP
start taking notes
The first few times this happened,
like a kindergarten kid, I would exclaim,
“Look what I did!” - so proud, so excited
fascinated and amazed.
And I actually believed it was MINE!

Fingertips on the keys and eyes on the screen
She is telling me NO, NONE OF IT IS MINE!
It belongs to the world
my only role is to disseminate
what is dictated to me

There are advantages to being held hostage:
I enjoy the process of hearing something
that hadn't occurred to me before
Feel relief that the job I do
frees me from all expectations and
I abdicate responsibility for what she says
(No I'm not schizoid, what makes you think that?)